I captured a sort-of 1 hour nap today (while subconsciously listening to the sounds of Owen not napping over the monitor), and got something like 5 hours of sleep last night (though not in a row). I feel like a million bucks! So, I feel like trying to scour memories of recent days from my brain and record them.

Today we took Asher to the pediatrician for a checkup at 5 weeks. 'Perfect!' was Dr. Hoder's diagnosis. Owen was extremely excited about this visit (because it wasn't for him), mostly because of having read 'Berenstain Bears Go to the Doctor' about 5 gazillion times recently. In the car on the way to the office he was talking about looking at Asher's eyes and nose and ears with a special little light over and over. And lo and behold, Dr. Hoder offered to let Owen hold the special little light and change it from white to green...Owen was in heaven. Asher, on the other hand, got the 2nd installment of a hepatitis vaccine, and was none too pleased. Believe it or not, he reacted worse to that shot than Owen ever did; I was surprised. He can get *really* mad if he wants to, and screams so hard that he loses his voice in the middle of each jagged cry. And he turns purple. The nurse felt terrible, and one would think that a pediatric nurse was used to these things! It's funny that Asher is overall much less fussy than Owen was but when he does have a temper flare, it is out of nowhere and very dramatic!

The big news of the visit was that Asher weighed in at 12 lbs 10 oz. Yes, that's right. He's gained 4 pounds in 5 weeks. Yikes!! I knew he had grown, but that's absurd. Owen grew similarly crazy fast, but I thought Asher would be a bit more conservative, having started out a pound smaller and all :P I was assured that it is no problem for him to be so big, but I am of course stressed that some sort of seeds of childhood obesity or later diabetes are being sown. I do feel that there's a point in his meals where he could probably be done, but I offer him more and he takes more. But I do this for good reason, because it seems to help him go the full 3/3.5 hrs between meals. Harumph. Maybe they're right and it's just how he's programmed to grow; after all Owen is a relative peanut now and he was a mammoth baby months 0-6. The one difference is that Owen was 95th%ile in all categories...head, length, weight. Asher is 50th% in head and length, 95th in weight!

Owen has been doing overall really well with the adjustment to Asher, lessening his whining significantly, and we start to see hints of an ability to get through a disappointment without resorting to an inconsolable tantrum. However, bedtime has become a bear. Owen absolutely hates being confined to his crib, but he is completely uninterested in trying out the big boy bed also in his room. So we have a whole lot of crying about getting in the crib, and then sometimes over an hour of fussing/moaning/tantruming about going to bed once he's in. Ah, not fun. We have (had) a firm policy of not returning to his room after bedtime for most of his first 2 years, and it served us well, but now he is creative enough to get us back in sometimes. This does lead to some cute moments too. Tonight I just watched/listened over the monitor to Reuel going in after hearing Owen complain that his shirt was 'sorta wet' and 'needs to put in washin' machine!' Owen was very happy to get Daddy to go in and change it for him, then he laid down and asked to be sung 'Morning is Broken' and 'Yellow Submarine'. Reuel apparently sang him versions of these songs on the one weekend I was out of town and he was hitting a dry well trying to think of toddler tunes when they had bedtimes together for a couple nights. Owen has never asked me for these songs, just Reuel, and Reuel never sings them with the same lyrics twice as far as I can tell.

A few phrases from recently...

'Mmm! Putatoes wif stwahbewwies in dem!' in reference to mashed redskin potatoes donated post-Asher by a wonderful friend.

'You wearing your comfy pants today!' in reference to sweatpants fished out of the back of the drawer for a rainy 60's August day.

'You don't like dat man (or replace man with many other nouns)! He scawes you!' while holding hands over ears (the universal Owen sign for not liking something). Owen always says 'you' when he means 'I' or 'me'.

Oh, so many more, but can't think of them.

Owen's absolute favorite thing to do right now is to help give Asher a bath. It's a wonder Asher hasn't drowned or gotten an eye infection from Owen dripping bathwater in his face as he tries to wash his hair (he absolutely can't resist attempting to wash his hair, even when we restrict it to a parent job). Very cute.

Owen has gone through a phase recently where he is extremely standoffish and retreats to the far corners of the house, (or the room if we're out) whenever a non-family member comes over or has a conversation with us. Then, he warms up within about 10 minutes. Just in the last couple of days he seems to be experimenting with friendliness and is being warmer right away. Today Mrs. Eleanor came to lunch with us at Lincoln Lab and Owen was happy to hold her hand (and was fascinated with the bandaid on her hand) and then during lunch he would reach over and just gently touch her arm and look at her. Funny! Even funnier, he is experimenting with showing other kids affection. At church on Sunday I was volunteering in the toddler nursery and Owen was there with me. Toward the end of the session I caught him over at the snack table standing with his hands gently on another ~18 month old's shoulders, Owen's face right at his cheek, and he was planting the most gentle, intimate little kisses on his cheek. These were no dive-and-peck kisses. They were slow and unashamed. It was absolutely shocking on the one hand (not only to me, but poor little Boaz looked like a deer in headlights!) and beautiful and adorable on the other. After seeing how this scene was going to pan out (Owen was apparently the alpha-toddler in this duo, Boaz was just biding his time til the smooch session ended, and Owen was in no hurry) I told Owen gently that he first needs to ask other kids if they want to be touched. But it seems like a crime to put a damper on such innocent affection (especially after the months of hair-pulling...I am all for kissing!!).

To end, we are still enjoying a freezer full of great food from Mommo and friends. Here's some not-edge-of-your-seat footage (but there are some good Owen laughs at the end) of Owen and Reuel enjoying some of it:
http://vimeo.com/6351364

Asher's current night schedule:

~8-12 sleep
12 eat
12:20-12:50 require interventions to return to sleep
~2 wake, not hungry yet, sometimes in discomfort prior to pooping, sometimes unexplained
2-2:30 require interventions to return to sleep
~3:15 wake and eat
3:30-4am require interventions to return to sleep
~5:30 wake and fed reluctantly (he's not really all that hungry but at this point no one has the energy to try to soothe him to sleep until he is)
~5:30-7:30 really restless sleeping, waking/rustling every 5 minutes or so.

What the heck?! No one is getting any sleep around here. It's actually deteriorated from the early days when there were some nights where he was doing at least solid 3 hr stretches. Reuel wonders about a milk allergy, but he doesn't have any 'classic' symptoms of that (like blood in stool, hives) And did I mention Owen isn't napping? Owen was a BAD sleeper, but at least he went right back to sleep after being fed at night. I had no idea this could happen! It's the same during the day, so it's not just day/night swapping I'm afraid. He just does this grunty squirmy thing every few minutes after you put him in the bassinet (or even if you hold him) and if you don't pacify him through it for nearly a half hour, he ramps up his crying and can't settle at all. Sigh! He's really a lot easier than Owen, except for this nighttime stuff!

:)

I feel that I may have achieved some sort of motherhood feat today. I would definitely feel proud if I were on my own. As it is, Debbie is here with us (yay!), so I really can't justly demand any kudos for handling things brilliantly. But, all the same, I just finished an afternoon of cleaning and cooking (sort of) for a dinner party, followed by nursing one child while attempting to get the other one to #2 on the potty at the same time. Debbie had to rescue us a bit at the end of the latter event, when things did not go as smoothly as desired. But still. Life is going to require quite a bit more energy in the near future! I hope that translates to automatic baby-weight loss, but I fear that may be one more thing to add to the to-do list; somehow there is always time to snack :P

We miss Mommo already! Thank you Mommo for your labors of love this last week...what a blessing. We just dropped her at the airport for her trip to Lily's place and everyone is napping (I should be, and will be soon!). And Aunt Deb arrives this afternoon; we are spoiled rottener than rotten. Mommo left us with a clean house and a stocked freezer, and Asher slept nearly 5 hrs. in a row last night. We're in a good spot right now!

Here are some pictures from Mommo's visit:

At the local pick-your-own farm; zinnia field


Tractor ride to the peach orchard


Mmm, peaches


Peach in one hand, eating raspberries off the bush with the other:


Happy threesome!


Asher checking out this Mommo person

More pictures

The past few days have been pretty smooth-sailing around here. Owen's lack-of-attention related tantrums have started to calm down a bit and Asher is being a bit more cooperative about naps...of course I say that as hear him giving Reuel a hard time in the next room. Mommo's calming presence and help have nothing to do with the smooth-sailing of course :) Ha ha. She is a wonderful resource and companion, and stepped in so sacrificially right when we needed her after my mom left! Not to mention she cleaned the dust bunnies *behind* the couch today. Wow. We may have to have more babies just so we can get a thorough cleaning every couple years.

Here's proud big brother holding his baby Ashew.




My fuzzy-head boy after a bath...unlike Owen this one's hair sticks STRAIGHT up when it is degreased.


I can't believe I did this but I gave him a haircut today. His hair was hanging almost an inch down over his ears. Now the problem is that the hair around the ears has been trimmed but I don't really want to trim it all the way around his neckline, so he has a pretty glorious baby mullet. Ugh.


Who knew the baby gym was so fascinating for 2 year olds. Owen was under it on and off all day showing Asher how to work it.

Pix!

Adjustments

Gosh I'm tired :) A good night is waking every 3-3.5 hrs. A bad one; little A is not sleeping more than 1 to 1.5 hrs at a time, and it takes long and involved efforts to get him back to sleep before another feeding (he's not hungry; just up). At this age Owen was zoinked pretty much all the time and it was hard to rouse him to eat. Not so this time! I really wish we were going to be able to go to Ohio for my grandmother's memorial, but the 12 hours of driving each way, 2 younguns and the lack of sleep don't work too well together we decided.

Well, Owen is definitely a big fan of baby bruddew Asher, and wants to be right there for diaper changes, feedings, etc. It is fun to see him already affectionate toward him and enjoying him. He loves to hold his hands on Asher's head while he's nursing and to pat his back like he sees me doing when I'm trying to get him to sleep. He also thinks giving him a binky is great fun. On the other hand, Owen has no idea that it is this delightful little creature who is rocking his world and making him a little rough around the edges the last few days. After a marvelous run with Nunu Spain in which he behaved like a gem, in the past few days there has been a pretty constant drone of whining from him all day, and he is quite tantrum-prone over silly things. I think the buildup of less mommy time and not being able to pick him up is getting to him, poor fella (and I can't say I like it any better! I miss our one-on-one days in many ways!). Hopefully it will be a season that will pass and give way to a better dynamic. It's hard to know how to keep that balance of not tolerating atrocious behavior while understanding that he's under some stress that makes it understandable. And I'm just too tired to fight him sometimes too, which doesn't help.

My mom is leaving earlier than expected on Tuesday to go to my Grandma's funeral. I am not feeling desperate like I did the first time about her departure, but on the other hand, yikes!! She's been manning one child while I've manned the other and I'm not sure how on earth Asher's going to get any sleep when I have to deal with Owen. Which leads me to my next thought. I DO NOT GIVE BIRTH TO SLEEPERS. Aren't newborns just supposed to sleep easily without much intervention? Don't people just sort of put them down in a chair or carseat and they nod off? Not mine!! Mine will start to drift off and then startle himself awake at least 10 times before finally hitting some deep sleep. If I am not there by his side to keep those arms pinned, hold, pat and shush him through that whole process (which seems to take up to 45 minutes, even when I'm there the whole time), he heads straight for the slaughtered-pig squeal and then he's really awake. Ugh. How does one do this all day with a toddler in tow. I was so sure I was going to do the 'drowsy but awake' strategy with this 2nd baby and get it *right*, but it is not happening. He is not a cooperative subject :} I have almost come to terms with not getting a much easier sleeper this time; I think I really had my hopes up for a wildly different experience. Asher *is* wildly adorable, though. The little grunts and squeaks and snortles are just delicious. And I think he looks a lot like Reuel...and I'm in his fan club.

Owen's been coming up with some super-cute moments himself lately. I jotted some of them down so I'd remember them...

-When Reuel gets ready to head to work in the morning Owen has started saying, 'OK my peeps!' Reuel's usual segue from house to car goes something like, 'OK my peeps, it's time for me to go! Give me a kiss goodbye!' It was pretty funny to start hearing the phrase preemptively from Owen.

-If I ask Owen to find a book on his bookshelf at nap or bedtime, he has taken to scanning his head back and forth across the room and saying, 'Where is it? Is it missing?' The other evening Reuel found the book in question and set it on the floor where Owen could see it. Owen took the book, set it up as high as he could reach on the shelves and proceeded to scan his head saying 'Where is it?' Then he went and 'found' it with a huge smile and said, 'You FOUND it all by yaself!'

-I could not figure out what 'en-oats' were at breakfast a few days ago. Owen was asking for more 'en-oats'. We finally realized that he was requesting 'More 'n Oats' which was his memory of the name of a cereal we eat called 'Oats 'n More'.

-Owen has a new vocab word: Shangwe. He really likes this word and uses it in sentences like, 'Shangwe go inside now, it's raining' and 'Shangwe get a juice bag' and 'Shangwe watch a movie?' Finally hit me that he is saying 'Shouldn't we'.

-Owen likes to get his face right up close to Asher's head while he's nursing. Here's a conversation from yesterday:

Owen: [Look] How little he is.
Me: Yes, he is so tiny! Look at those tiny feet!
Owen: Smell baby Asher.
Me: Does Asher smell good? What does he smell like?
Owen: Baby Asher smell like...umm...sugar.
Me: Really, he smells like sugar?
Owen: Nn-hnn. Smell like...lemons!
Me: What else does he smell like?
Owen: Ummm...smells like...flowers.

This morning, while hugging my knees as I was dressing after my shower.
Owen: Smell mommy.
Me: Does mommy smell good? What do I smell like?
Owen: Mommy smell like...umm...ketchup!

So there ya go.


Say Cheese Owen style!

Grandma

Friends,

We would like you to know that our dear Mother, Donnalee Folck Spain, went to be with her Lord and Savior on Friday, August 7, 2009 at 10:12p. We hope you do not mind this email notice as there are so many to contact. As with our Father’s passing, we are following her wishes not to have an obituary, but there will be a memorial service with details to be determined soon. It was her desire to treat her family and friends to a buffet luncheon.

After a lifetime of struggling with a mitochondrial disorder, Mom went peacefully and gently. She was an amazing woman and foremost was her faith and prayer life. Throughout her life, Mom struggle with weakness, lack of energy and eye problems. It was not until 1996 that she was diagnosed with Kearns-Sayre Syndrome. Mitochondria was only discovered in the last couple of decades and the 40 some disorders only realized in the last 15 years. Just recently they discovered that mito disorders are extremely common and related to so many other common conditions, such as Parkinson’s and Diabetes. Mom went most of her life struggling with this undiagnosed condition, but in this struggle she learned that God had a purpose. His purpose for her was that of a life committed to prayer for family, friends and this world. Every single day was dedicated to prayer, including the last day of her life. She was able to see many of her prayers answered, and left knowing that many more will be answered in the days and years to come. Her lifelong Bible verse that she claimed for herself is:

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of

Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and calamities. For when I am weak,

Then I am strong. II Corinthians 12:9-10

And strong she was. Mom was the strongest weakest frailest person there ever was. On Thursday when she realized that her kidneys had failed, she eagerly embraced her imminent homecoming. Her words over and over were, Hallelujah! She was ready and willing to be free of the burden and finish the race. She missed our father greatly and his name was her last conscious words. We will greatly miss her wisdom, insight, dry sense of humor, warmth and love. We remain immensely proud of her perseverance in suffering; her determination to be independent; her willingness to stand firm in her faith; her love of family and her dog, Rockwell; and so much more. We rejoice in her homecoming! Hallelujah!

Your prayers, assistance and offers of help have meant so much to us. We will get back to you with the details of Mom’s buffet luncheon, which will be in the next week. Burial will be private.

One final word voiced by Mom in her last days. If you are struggling; feeling lost or hopeless; fearing death and beyond; or whatever else may be burdening your heart --- then trust that real hope and truth can be found in the Lord Jesus Christ. Our existence is just not mere spontaneous science, but part of God’s redemptive plan for His Creation. Mom had great respect for the Biblical teachings of Pastor Alistair Begg. You can find a radio station or listen online at Truth For Life, www.truthforlife.org

Thank you,

The Spain Family

Donnalee Folck Spain

February 10, 1927 to August 7, 2009

married December 24, 1946 to

Gail Elliott Spain, Jr.

August 6, 1925 to November 1, 2005

Milk Coma

We're awaiting checkout...tap, tap, tap, tap, tap goes the foot. Hospitals are slow-movin' places when you're the healthy one! No complaints there.

Our nurse just came to give me my motrin tablet. She is under the assumption that giving it to me and then waiting a while before removing my staples will help me. I'm thinking...I get in and out of bed with a slice in my abdomen and have a baby chewing on my nipples 8 times a day right now...I don't think motrin is going to make a significant difference in any staple removal pain. Let's do this thing!

Asher was within 1 ounce of his birth weight at his checkup last night...that was a 6oz. gain in 2 days! Did I mention I have a too-much-milk problem again :) Apparently it's normal to get back to birth weight by 2 weeks old, so at 4 days old (and no supplementation this time), we are ridiculously ahead of the curve, and Asher is going to be a big guy in short order! Asher has been *incredibly* patient learning to drink from the fire hose. When he starts to choke and cough, he stops sucking and makes a little squeaky noise (translation: 'Mommy, why?') and then patiently bides his time til he's ready to jump back in. Owen would have been screeching at me! So I am very grateful for this patience on his part, and hope we'll fully find our nursing groove soon. Sitting him up while he eats seems to help a lot, so we're experimenting with that. OK, that's probably more than enough milk stories for anyone reading :)

Reuel has also been incredibly patient...both of us are antsy here at the hospital, but Reuel hasn't been incised, so he could actually do something outside of these walls if we could leave! Oh, I forgot to mention that we were all packed up to go adn ready to discharge yesterday until Asher had a spit-up with some blood in it. Everyone was 99% sure it was nothing, but we went ahead and stayed the night on the ped's recommendation, just so we wouldn't have to turn aroudn and come back in if the problem persisted. He's not done it again, so we've just been twiddling thumbs til our discharge this morning.

Owen. My mom and Owen have been getting on famously, and I think Owen would be fine if we never came home again! I'm not sure we've been missed at all! They have kept busy at parks, malls, Chuck E Cheese, blueberry picking, etc. etc. When asked if he would rather visit mommy and daddy and Asher or go to Chuck E Cheese yesterday, the answer was, 'ChuckE!' And would you like to talk to daddy on the phone? 'Nope!' said Owen. I'm especially sure that my mom has been having a good time, getting the grandkid to herself without the mother hovering over and preventing her from doing things her way, and spoiling to her heart's content ;) Bottom line, we are SOOOOOO grateful for her labors and willingness to help; it has been absolutely wonderful to know he's in good hands and to not be worrying about him. I just can't wait to see him again, I miss him so much!! Haven't seen him since Wednesday :(

Well, it's about time for those staples to come out (I hope), so I sign off.