Open mouth, insert words

Regarding nighttime potty training:  "I'll make sure to post that I've had to eat these words if we have a big setback, in the interest of our case study."

Well, he certainly is still doing mighty well, and accidents aren't very frequent (less than a handful of incidents total).  In fact, he may have relapsed because of grandparent visiting and excitement; haven't had an accident since then.  BUT, the solid 2-week alarm-free spell did not last perfectly.  FYI.  :)

Grandparents!

Today ended a lovely multi-day visit with Mommo and Daddo, in which we played a-plenty, picked a-plenty apples, did a few projects, and mostly just enjoyed each other's company (and ate a lot...whew, salad for a week for me).  The kids really savored the time, and little Asher was in all kinds of tears this morning to say goodbye.  Of course, they acted like hooligans much of the time, but their Mommo and Daddo were very tolerant (you'd think they'd done this six times before, or something!).

I didn't snap too many pictures because we were too busy living, but here's a few...

Daddo brought toy trucks and bulldozers...with multiple electronic sounds!!!  Doesn't get more fun than that.  Many a moment occupied with living room driving and construction.  Getting the toys out of the box is a project unto itself...

If you give a mouse a cookie...
If you take a Daddo to an apple orchard where there are more than 16 apple varieties...you come home with a lot of apples, and each one labeled, for flavor comparisons!  'Spencer' apples were a newly-discovered and yummy variety, which pair excellently with Mommo's pie crust.  Also came home with Jonagold, Suncrisp, Macoun, Early and Late Fuji, Shizuka, Cameo, Golden Delicious, Honeycrisp, Empire, Cortland, Empire, Creston, Topaz, and more I just can't remember off the top of my head.

Asher discovered the horsie.  The horsie took a beating when Asher threw himself on for rides, but held up phenomenally well!

Owen and I worked on a post-visit feast of butternut squash soup, homemade bread, salad and Jonagold apple cake this afternoon to occupy the sudden feeling of empty space around the house!  Thanks for a really nice week. 

Sometimes...

There come the days where you just don't care if the pj's match, if the toddler has britches, or if meals are spoiled with too much cookie dough.  This was one of them.  At least we managed to have some fun :)

Happy Birthday Reuel!

My husband is getting OLD!!!

The fair

I was feeling a bit forlorn about Reuel leaving for a business trip last night, and missing his Columbus Day holiday, and no preschool for Owen to boot.  Since we've been a bit housebound lately trying to make progress on bathroom remodel, I decided late last night to throw tiredness to the wind, forget I am exceedingly pregnant, and take the kids to the last day of the Topsfield fair this morning.  WOW.  Haven't been to a fair in so long, I really forgot the vibe.  The junk food!  The questionable characters running the rides!  The crowds on a relatively sweltering 80 degree, sunny holiday!  The extreme overpricing!  The wide-eyed temptation to beg for everything in sight when you're 2 or 4 years old!  Well, we had a very good time, but I was SO exhausted on the ride home.  Asher does not like the stroller, and I have not done a good job of teaching him that it is not optional, so he did a lot of walking, and I did a lot of running back and forth like a spastic chipmunk and chasing so that he would disappear in the crowds.  I was also being indulgent with him because he was so devastated to not join Owen on rides...it turns out that he was too short for all but one ride, and all but one carnie would not be convinced to let a pregnant woman accompany him (tell me the last time a woman was sent into early labor as the result of a carousel ride, PLEASE).  I spent a fortune.  I kind of knew that would happen so didn't worry about it since it was our special event while Daddy is away (though we *really* would have rather shared the excitement with Dad!!).

Let's see, we saw...
*milking demonstration
*cows, ducks, turkeys, pigs, sheep, goats, chickens, roosters, bunnies, llamas, an elephant, a camel, ponies, and we narrowly missed the bengal tiger show.
*New England's largest pumpkin of 2011 (Yup, it was large.)
*Cart horse competitions...kids enjoyed the HUGE draft horses.
*Police K-9 dog demo

And we spent...
$10 parking
$12 admission
$18 eight ride tickets
$3 cotton candy
$13 two corn dogs and french fries
$4 lemonade
$5 two bottles of water
$3 ice cream cone
gas money, 45 mins drive each way.

Insane!  Looking at that list I feel awfully indulgent, but let me tell you, that was after telling the kids no to about 4 out of 5 things they asked for!!  I guess the fair still got a pretty good milking from us :O

Ash

 Eating while watching Dad mow=prevention of toddler jack-in-the-box syndrome at mealtime.

Asher's fave cheeseball face.

Overworked and Underpaid

Update on night pottying

 For the unusually curious, or intense fan of my children...and more, for my own memory and future reference.

So.  There has been a lot of progress on nighttime pottying.  I am thrilled to be able to say this!!  When we started thinking about pushing toward nighttime training, our initial stab in the dark was to run out of pull-ups, put on thick, rewashable nighttime underwear that was supposed to hold liquid, but allow the feeling of wetness, and to make the investment in changing sheets and clothes as often as needed at night in the hopes that this unpleasant nighttime interruption would help something click for Owen and prompt him to wake pre-release and head for the toilet.  In a phrase...not so much.  For at least 3 solid weeks we did this and the only result was feeling like we were on a newborn schedule again (as Owen predictably wet 3 times per night in trainers that did NOT hold much liquid), an unhappy child, a WHOLE lot of laundry, and a kid who would just as happily sleep wet as dry, his brain never waking him to prevent the event.  Fast forward after doing a fair bit of reading, research, reviews, and prepwork with Owen to get him excited about a new plan.

Key book for understanding the issue:  Getting to Dry by Maziels, Rosenbaum, and Keating of Children's Memorial Hospital Chicago
Alarm purchased, and approach based on included instructions:  Dri Eclipse wireless from anzacare.com (no small investment, but one we thought well worth it in order that a 4 year old not have the added hassle and discomfort of a wire running along their pj's and an electronics box clipped to their shirt)

There was LOTS of parental propaganda designed to incite excitement about using a 'beeper' at night.  We thought of some incentives and rewards and made it just a really fantabulous thing to get to wear a beeper in your underwear.  Oh yeah!  Owen would even say, "Look Asher, here's my beeper, you don't get to wear one yet because you're not big enough!"  Then, the hard work.  Every time he wet, which as I mentioned was an extremely consistent three times a night, 2 on a really good night, one of us would hear the alarm, get up and wake him (he did not wake to it readily), take him to the potty, change everything as needed, reset alarm and back to bed.  In the beginning this happened 3 times per night :}  Eventually we learned the trick of having him wear the alarm+undies, covered by a pull-up, so at least all we were changing was underwear and pullup, and not sheet and jammies too.  It wasn't even a week until he was down to one or two wets per night, and shortly thereafter, it was almost always just once, and after maybe a month...some nights with no alarms at all.

Just a couple weeks ago we were feeling great that the wetting incidents were so diminished, but the real goal--getting up BEFORE the beeper and using the potty--hadn't yet happened.  He was wetting less, but still a beep that he didn't wake for if there was a need to potty.  My feeling was that he didn't really mind the beeping since we'd talked it up so much, and there wasn't a mental incentive to change status quo.  So we had MORE talks and hype about someday being able to not use the beeper at all, being able to pass it on to Asher someday, having a party when he could start waking up to go potty before the beeper, and...drum roll...the real thing that probably worked...a loft bed (we've been planning to move O & A into a room together before the new baby comes, and this was going to happen anyway ;).  After that round of discussions, he actually woke up one night screaming and it turned out he needed to go.  Then, after praising him no end, and explaining that next time the screaming could be bypassed, he next came and got me in bed, and we WENT TO THE POTTY BEFORE THE BEEP!  Glorious.  It's happened a few nights since, and between that and nights he doesn't go at all, he's now gone for 10 nights completely dry.  The instructions with the alarm say that 14 nights can be considered home free, with the occasional possibility of relapse months later, in which case, use alarm again until 14 nights dry.  So exciting!!  We've been buttering that boy up both sides every time he makes a baby step and he is pretty big in his britches about this achievement.  And really, it is a huge thing isn't it!  I'm proud of him for working with us.  (And grateful for the research that a New Zealand pediatrician has put into the bedwetting alarm...so awesome for us parents to have something tested to try with some confidence it might work.)

So now, if you can believe it, on my IOU list to Owen is a 4-round-tier cake with a frosting-depicted beeper on the top layer (the top layer's diameter is to be approximately 2 inches...this is all Owen's description), and a party to which friends will be invited (Owen's insistence).  Perhaps 4 year olds are young enough to not really have a heyday with the concept of a party focused on the cessation of bedwetting.  I think we'll try to keep the theme subtle.  And, something like this setup, which will go over the cubby in his room and have a beanbag underneath (my idea).  I need to get to IKEA to pick up the bed and mattress. 

Lest one worry that we are overly hopeful that we've reached the end of this journey, we are fully aware that relapses may be in store.  But now that we have a system and a good deal of success, we're hopeful the setbacks will be fewer than greater.

Interesting notes.  Apparently there is a hormone burst produced in the early evening that causes the production of urine to slow down overnight.  It's apparently missing in some kids, or doesn't develop.  The Dr. who makes the alarm says that they don't really understand why, but using the alarm must actually help to develop the hormone pattern, because the general reaction to the alarm is not just to get up and go to the bathroom more, but rather to stop having the need to go as much and to produce less urine.  How mysterious.  But it totally seems to be the case.  Also, forgot to mention that we began the alarm use in early August, took a week off for family camp in late August, and now it's early October.  So, it was about 2 months, and the alarm instructions indicated a 1 to 2 month process, shorter for older kids.

Finally, for anyone reading who thinks we're crazy.  We might be.  About 90% of anecdotal evidence we collected from family and friends indicated that in all likelihood, kids stop wetting on their own, maybe with some mild encouragement, by age six or so.  We have so many friends who just waited and it all worked out.  Then, there were a few stories where it didn't.  So, while we really weren't desperate to push him, he was willing, and when we would talk about it, he was ready to be done with pullups and to try the alarm (we weren't twisting his arm to do something he was against).  Also, saving throwing all those pullups in the trash (and all the money) sounded good.  And, if it's just a matter of working on a problem sooner or later, why not do it sooner when he's less self conscious and not feeling a sense of embarrassment at all.  So, that's why we went for it.  We figured we'd back off and wait if it wasn't working.  There was no harshness on our part or even a sense of discipline, just working together and encouragement.  I don't think it would have been bad to wait (actually after we'd already ordered I finally found the section in the literature where the alarm is recommended for kids 5 and over!), but since we've had some success now, I'm glad we went ahead.  But it *was* quite a bit of work for all of us :}

I'll make sure to post that I've had to eat these words if we have a big setback, in the interest of our case study.

Tile, tile and more tile.

What a job!

After spending weeks...no months...shimming every surface of the bathroom three times over to get walls and floors that approximate some degree of plumb-ness...the drywall and tile backerboard finally went up and Reuel started tiling the shower this weekend.  Deb has been here too, entertaining the small, disruptive ones and DOING CHORES IN MY HOUSE behind my back.  Naughty!!  But so wonderful.  Definitely enabling Reuel to focus on the job at hand.  She leaves tomorrow, so back to the real world til Mommo and Daddo visit in a few weeks!  Will we have the bathroom functional by then?  Tick, tock, tick, tock...