Mischief is brewing...

Owen has always been a bit of a handful (ahem), but one thing he hasn't been too bad about is getting into things or situations we tell him are 'no-no's'. He's generally really respectful of rules, probably because he loves order and routine so much. If we tell him it's not OK to throw the coasters on the floor, he might look at them with interest now and then, but then he'll look up at us, see our confirmed disapproval of his plan, and he'll back right off. If he has gotten into something especially tempting--like my eye shadow--in the past when I walk in and catch him he startles, knows he's guilty and puts it right down and doesn't touch it again for many weeks to come. This may be starting to change...he's starting to flagrantly touch more and more no-no's in front of my face lately, and is getting pretty slow to reverse his course when he's caught. Time-outs are not new to him, and they're not very threatening to him either...he sits in his spot and sings or talk to himself rather sassily, and when I walk in to retrieve him, he puts a knowingly cheesy grin on his face. Is this working? I have no idea, but for now we're going with consistency. I was recently remembering when my Dad would spank me and I would consciously think, 'This doesn't really hurt and I don't really need to cry, but if I cry and act sad then he stops sooner.' So, maybe Owen's level of emotional devastation over a moment of discipline is not really a great measure of its effectiveness. Just a thought...

This week we've had lots of turning on of the TV, lots of messing with the computer mouse, lots of getting into the flour drawer with a tablespoon measure and measuring flour onto the counter, lots of putting on of brown eye shadow, lots of dental floss unrolling, lots of toy throwing, and a fair bit of kicking and screaming about getting in the high chair, resulting in far-flung food. Not too bad really, but definitely a step up in defiance level from a couple of weeks ago. I caught him a couple of days ago smeared in my dark brown eye shadow...that stuff is hard to get off! Today I came out of the bathroom to find him sitting on top of the desk in the office...had shimmied up the chair and onto the desk. He is also learning to fish food out of the pantry cabinet and refrigerator without assistance. Really overall he's still quite a sweet kid, though, with the exception of transition times between activities...he's never been adaptable, and doesn't seem to be improving all that much, but we're used to that. I can hardly remember when I didn't think 10 steps ahead of every move I make to carefully construct a series of events and bribes which will at least partially stem the all-day tantrum which results if I move forward through my day like a normal person. Example: It's 8:30 and we need to leave the house at 9. Go to the bathroom now so I don't have to leave him in the living room later once he's gotten upset after finding out we're taking a car trip. Mention to Owen that we're going to leave before heading to the bathroom. Listen to Owen scream 'No! No way! No! No way!' while going to the bathroom. Think of a way to pose our trip as something fun that Owen would want to do without lying to him (rarely works). Get coat down off hook (tantrum inducing moment) while telling Owen it's time to take his vitamin (which he loves). Put on coat while dangling the idea of the vitamin in front of him and inching toward the bottle while zipping coat. Get vitamin and lure him out the front door before giving it to him. Swipe him up and quickly get him buckled in before chewing is done. It may not sound all that bad to an outsider, but from my perspective I just long to decide to go somewhere and go on auto-pilot until I realize voila, I'm there! Instead of mapping each tiny detail of the trip...but I'm not really complaining, I have company during my day, even if there is a little price to pay. I have also often tried the 'too bad you don't like it, kick and scream all you want, we're doing things my way on my schedule' approach, but that is even more painful...much more painful.

I think we had kind of a rough day today. Looking back over what I wrote confirms this...I sound disgruntled. Tomorrow he'll be the best and cutest 20 month old there ever was; that's how it goes!