Bedtime story

I found a new story template that might work for me on an off night...which is becoming more frequent...I'm suffering from storyteller's burnout.  Pbblt.  Tonight was definitely an off night but I summoned what I could, for the love of Owen, and I definitely am keeping this template on the shelf.

Step 1.  Choose a subject and a setting.
"Once upon a time there was a candle, a HUUGE candle.  It was 10 feet tall, which is taller than the ceiling of a room in a house.  It stood in the middle of the town and next to it was a ladder.  No one could possibly think of lighting it without the ladder next to it because it was so big."

[Pause for question:  When it was burning, was the flame as big as a campfire??  YES, why yes it was!]

Step 2.  Craft a snafu.
"Each night the town candlelighter would climb the ladder and light the candle as soon as the sun went down, and would let it burn for two hours until it was bedtime for the townspeople.  Then, he would climb the ladder and put out the flame.  [Continue boldly hoping questions about how one puts out a bonfire might be avoided.  Whew.]  The candle would only burn a tiny bit in 2 hours because it was so big, and he would do the same thing night after night after night.  Well, one night he lit the candle, but then...he forgot to put it out.  So it burned all...night...long.

Step 3.  Chain of cause and effect.
"When the candle was still burning in the middle of the night, it caused all the animals who lived in the town common to get all mixed up, and they stayed awake almost all night when they normally would have been sleeping.  Then, they finally fell asleep when it was almost time to wake up and they slept in really, really late into the day.  Normally, the town animal catchers started early in the morning at their job of catching animals in the town common, but that morning there were no animals anywhere!  So, the animal catchers got really bored and decided to go have some coffee.  The coffee shop was not normally too busy in the morning, but because all the animal catchers showed up, the owner of the coffee shop was too busy serving them coffee and donuts, and didn't get to run the errand he'd planned to run that morning while the shop wasn't very busy.  The coffee shop owner was supposed to pick up his friend's mail.--his friend had been on vacation--so the mailbox didn't get too full.  But, when he couldn't get to the mailbox on time, the mailman arrived and was pushing and shoving all the day's mail into the crowded mailbox so hard that the post of the mailbox broke right in two!  The mailman instantly drove to the hardware store to get a new mailbox for the man on vacation since he'd accidentally broken his old one, and so all the rest of the town had their mail delivered very late.  One man in the town was waiting and waiting for his mail to arrive because he was entered in a contest and knew that if he was the winner, he would be getting a piece of mail that very day to tell him that he'd won!  When the mail never came, he figured that he had *not* won the contest, and he became very, very sad.  He walked down by the river and was crying and crying while he walked.

Step 4.  Choose happy or sad ending.
"As he walked, a woman came over to him and asked him why he was so sad.  He told her that he had lost a contest.  They started talking, and talking, and talking, and became very good friends by the end of the day.  Eventually they fell in love with each other!  And got married!  So you see, all because the candlelighter forgot about his job, something very wonderful happened.  And, I should add, that when the man got home very late that night, his mail had arrived, and he had in fact won the contest and became a millionaire on that day as well.

Step 5.  Deal with loose ends.
Owen:  He won a MILLION dollars?!!!  What kind of contest was it??
Mom:  Oh, I don't know Owen, some contest where you could win a million dollars.
Owen:  But WHAT mom??  How do you get in a contest to win a million dollars.  I REALLY need to know.
Mom:  Owen, it's a story.  I made it up!  There is not a real contest like that to enter.  Just pretend!
Owen:  Mom, if you made up the story, then you can make up a contest.  Come on.
Mom:  Oh, yes, well, it was a yogurt company contest.  He had to send in as many yogurt lids as he could and it was a contest to see who ate the most yogurt in a year.  He had been eating a LOT of yogurt.
Owen:  Oh.  [contemplative silence]
Mom:  Goodnight, Owen!
Owen:  [still contemplating]

Moment in the life

[End of a long day, mom goes into the bathroom and locks the door.  Alone.  Finally.]
"MA-AHM!"
[Ignore this and it will disappear.  She tells herself.]
"MAAAAHH-AHM!"
"MOM!  MOMMY!  WHERE ARE YOU?"
[pause]
"MOM!"
"MAAAAAAAAA-AHHHM!"  "MOM, MOM, WHERE ARE YOU?"
"MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHM!"
"MOMMY!  MOMMY!  MOMMY!"
"MOM!  CAN YOU HEAR ME?"
"MOM?"
"MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHM!"
[She finally breaks, awkwardly leans forward, opens the door a crack]
"OWEN!  GOOD GRIEF, what is it??  I'm in the bathroom?" [reshuts and locks the door]
"Oh, there you are."  [attempts to open door]  "I just picked NINE tomatoes.  Can you believe that?"
"Let's talk about this when I'm done."
"MOM!  I PICKED NINE TOMATOES!"
"Owen.  When.  I'm.  Done."
"Oh."
[Mom opens door shortly.  Boy is waiting within 1 foot.]
"MOM!  I picked nine whole tomatoes!"
"So I heard."

Someday I will miss this?  So I've heard.  :)

Advice for Boys

I read this blog, and I have grown a deep respect for the writer's advice.  Here is such a short, practical list on her blog today I have to post it for my memory.  She's a mom of 8 boys and 1 girl, if I remember correctly (homeschooled them all, of course...wow).  http://www.ordo-amoris.com/2013/07/circe-handout-3-quick-guide-to.html

The 'let him drive' point is interesting.  This is the rub between Owen and I.  I always think that I will adjust behavior problems by taking away what I perceive as excessive autonomy or freedom that is making him big in his britches.  But it's a delicate dance to figure out when to actually give more of the wheel to ease the tension over who's in control.  I've never been a good dancer.

Quick Guide to Parenting Boys

Their Identity is tied to the questions:

Am I man enough?

Am I up to the challenge? 

Solutions:

Sleep

Exercise (including team sports)

Hard Work

Fresh air and Sunshine

Mothers and Sons:

The DO NOTS:

Do not nag

Do not moralize/spiritualize

Do not make it personal

Do not remove challenges from your son’s life.

The Dos:

Be a Strong Woman (Contemplate the word ‘impervious’)

Teach your son to laugh at himself

Let him fail

Give him responsibility

Need him

Provide challenges

Listen to him/Let him drive

Pray for him

Respect him.

What month is it?

It's been a busy few weeks.  In the middle of trying to finish remodeling...which has now ground to a halt...we had a lovely visit with Reuel's sister, husband and four kids here at our house.  Beach (where we caught lots of crabs!), fruit-picking, lake, enjoying play with cousins, Old Ironsides...so much fun!  I think they have most of the pictures :)  Then, all 11 of us left simultaneously for Texas where we had a surprise reunion with that side of the family.  Also great fun!  (Also have no pictures...too busy enjoying everyone's company.)  We flew back on a Sunday night and VBS at our church started Monday morning.  I'm sure I have relayed my sob story of commuting to way too many people, so I will just state in summary that while we love VBS, and love being with our friends, it is not an easy week.  Our worst day was a 1h45min one-way commute and our best was 1 hour...with 4 kids; we brought our neighbor.  It would not have been as bad if I had not been nursing some strange ailment that started with coughing back during our TX visit, and has just progressed to all-out lung dysfunction that is keeping me up at night and puffing albuterol (made an urgent care visit late in the week) to function at all.  I am headed back in to the Dr. next week.  Yuck.  You kind of need to be able to breathe well to function during a VBS week.  Reuel took the kids swimming this morning, so sitting on a chair and blogging is my desperately needed moment of rest.  Whine, whine, whine.  It really has been a fun summer.

Not too many pictures, but here's what I've got:

There are those rare moments when I achieve 'Zen Mommy' state, and here is one.  Someone got into the nonpareils and made a spill.  Instead of my normal reflexive move to scold and get mad, I managed to smile, and say, "why don't you guys have fun playing with the sprinkles before you clean them up?"  Why is it so hard to come up with these kind ways of dealing with the unexpected more often?  Clearly, I had slept that night :P

End of year gymnastics show!

Preschool 'graduation'...in today's leave-no-one-out culture, even the non-graduates get different colored graduate caps :P

Ready for the 4th of July parade!  What a big girl...the days are flying by.

Lorin, my temporary designer-in-residence helped me immensely with some paint choices.  The one you see in the background here is a no-go.  I might attempt painting this room with her choice this afternoon, we'll see.

With cousin Sterling before blueberry and cherry picking!

Learning how bing cherries grow:

Li'l sister

Little sisters of big brothers get taken on big adventures when mom isn't looking.  And mom of course does not go to rescue, but runs for the camera :}

Father's Day 2013

Happy Father's Day 2013 to my kids' Daddy and to our Dad's here and departed for all you have done for us and for the love you have sacrificially given for many, many years.

Absolutely impossible to get a family picture of these wigglers!

Best Father's Day present for Reuel:

Asher, when asked what he would like to be when he grows up, always says, "A dragon."  On Father's Day this year, he paused pensively at one point and said, "No, I want to be a Daddy."  I said, "What Asher?  What are you talking about?"  He said, "I wanted to be a dragon, but now I want to be a Daddy."

Last soccer game